Ug

In case any of you people on the internets ever end up in Casa Dufair, I think it’s prudent to provide a quick reference guide translating Dufair-ese into English so you can understand what my kids and I are talking about. Please print this out and carry it in your wallet or purse. Even those that can properly pronounce modern English have a few holdovers:

Emma:
rolly-roll = tootsie roll
prencel = pretzel rod
cramera = camera
snamp = stamp

Ian:
Lemo = Nintendo DS
back-a-yard = backyard
dunklings = dumplings (a.k.a. pot stickers)

Alyssa:
Bata = Grandpa

Now, if you forget to bring this cheat sheet, you can always ask for a translation. For example, I was playing a game yesterday at the kitchen table with Ian after dinner. I forget the name of the game. Marbles and rods and you try not to let the marbles drop. Ian pulled a rod and dropped a bunch of marbles in his tray (recall that Ian is 4 years old):

Ian: “Ug”
Me (just for banter’s sake): “What does ‘ug’ mean, Ian?”
Ian (deadpan): “It means shit dad.”
Me (supressing a gasp): “Ian! You’re not supposed to say ’shit’.”
Ian (deadpan, again): “I know dad. That’s why I said ‘ug’.”

Duh.